| Torchwood :
The Promise
The Promise
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Mostly a post "Cyberwoman" story, but it contains info gleaned from "Fragments" and an epiloge set after "Adrift," so spoilers for those episodes.
Summary: Jack asks Ianto to make a promise.
Disclaimer: No infringment intended. No money made. Just playing in the Torchwood sandbox.
Author's Notes: Many thanks to pollitt for beta and kaynyne for making the boys sound less like Yanks.
This story was written for autiger23.
*~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*~
The Promise
by Maverick
It's late when Jack arrives at Ianto's door. Jack's kept as close of an eye on Ianto as he could since the beginning of his suspension but he knew Ianto probably wouldn't be glad to see him. When the door opens, he knows he's right.
Ianto is barefoot, wearing pajama pants and a faded t-shirt adorned with the name of some band that Jack has never heard of. His face is stubbled and his eyes are blood shot. The only recognisable thing about him is the brief flash of anger that flares when he looks at Jack. “Come by to Retcon me yourself?”
Jack smiles and shakes his head no. "I thought we already had this discussion. One month suspension."
Ianto braces his arms against the door frame, leaning out toward Jack. "Hardly seems a fair punishment for putting Torchwood at risk."
Jack has to stop himself from reaching out to touch Ianto's shoulder in a show of support. He knows the other man isn't ready to be comforted yet, especially by Jack. "Well, we’ve all been fools for love Ianto. Don’t tell the others but it actually makes me admire you a bit more."
That gets a reaction as Jack knows it will. "Pardon?"
Smiling, Jack looks Ianto directly in the eyes. "Anyone who can keep a secret like that right under all of our noses is someone I want on my team."
Letting go over the door frame, Ianto stands up straight and narrows his eyes like he can't believe what Jack is telling him. "Even though I lied to you?"
Jack smirks at him. "I’ve never considered lying to be a character flaw."
Ianto gives him what Jack calls his, 'you've got to be kidding me' look. He decides he should cut Ianto some slack. It's been a rough couple of weeks for him. "And besides we both know you won’t do it again."
Ianto nods in agreement. "You were angry. You were prepared to shoot me."
As much as it would have bothered him, Jack would have done it. Another senseless, yet necessary death in a long line of them. "True. But not because you lied."
"Why then?" Ianto looks truly interested in the answer.
Jack takes the easy way out. "Because you were blinded to everything but the girl you lost."
Another 'you've got to be kidding look' greets him. "Now who’s lying?"
"Am I?"
Ianto nods. "You were angry at me for pulling one over on you."
Oh yeah he was. He probably owes Ianto at least the truth in that.
"I'm not usually so easily taken in. You surprised me, and again that's just another reason to keep you around."
Ianto leans against the door this time. "So let me get this straight. The fact I lied to you, that I endangered all that you've built makes you want to keep me on? I find that hard to believe, even from you."
"I admit, I was angry. I don't like being played anymore than the next person. But the fact that you did it so expertly, so easily, impresses me more than it makes me angry. And it won't happen again. So I guess you could say, I’m over the anger and moved on to the admiration
Ianto's face is pained and Jack can hardly hear the, "it wasn't easy," before he straightens up and puts the mask back in place. "Any reason for this visit besides this heart to heart?"
"Actually yes. Do you think you could invite me in or shall we do it here on the doorstep?” Jack can't help the innuendo that creeps into his voice. It's the first time in weeks that he sees Ianto almost crack a smile.
With a flourish of his arms, Ianto steps aside. "Please come in."
Jack steps inside and leans back against the shut door. He doesn't remark at how messy Ianto's flat is with take away boxes and newspapers strewn about. It makes him wonder if Ianto's tidiness was just another layer of deceit or if this is just a reaction to recent events. As they make their way into the living room, Jack notices all Ianto's DVDs, books and CDs are in alphabetical order by genre. It makes him want to laugh in relief, but that's not why he's here. He needs Ianto's help, so he cuts to the chase. "There’s been another negative energy surge from the rift."
Ianto nods. "I guess it was only a matter of time. Who went missing?"
"A young girl, Bethan Crandell. Sixteen. Sneaked out to go to a club. Never made it there."
"Any trace?"
"Yes, she came back through about 30 minutes ago. Unwilling or unable to talk. The hospital has her down as a Jane Doe. No visible signs of trauma other than her hair has turned stark white. They'll release her to us when we get there. I’ve contacted Helen and she has a room ready, but I can’t get her out to the island by myself."
"I thought I was suspended."
Jack has to smile at that. "Technically, you are, but this isn’t really a Torchwood mission, now is it? Besides, you’re the only one who knows about the island besides me."
"Why is that exactly?"
Jack for once doesn't have a ready answer. Before Lisa he would have said because I trust you, because you're loyal to me even at the expense of Torchwood, because I know that you more than any of the others will understand why I have to do this. But he couldn't say any of that, not now. Not that a part of him didn't still believe it, though. Maybe even more so than before. So Jack went with as much truth as he could. "You put the victims at ease in a way that I can’t. Guess I should of known there was a reason for that." If the last part came out a little harsher than he meant it, no one could blame him. Not even Ianto.
“Let me go get changed.”
Ianto is back in record time, dressed in jeans and an Aran sweater. Jack watches as Ianto pulls out several thermoses and begins making coffee. "Oh yeah. Coffee. Excellent idea."
Ianto bats Jack's hand away as he goes to grab a mug. "Not for you."
Pouting, Jack leans against the worktop. His mouth is watering just from the smell. Two weeks without Ianto's coffee will do that to you. "You can't possible drink that all yourself."
"No, I can't. But it's not for me either. It's for Helen and her staff. The island gets cold this time of year."
Jack can't really argue with that. And if anyone deserves Ianto's coffee, it's Helen. But still... "You can't spare one cup."
Ianto shakes his head no and fills a thermos without spilling a drop. "I'm on suspension, remember. I'll make you coffee when I'm officially back at work and not before."
Jack sighs. It's going to be a long night.
~*~*~*~
Just as Jack knew he would, Ianto is able to keep Bethan calm and comfortable on the trip over to the island. Ianto holds her hand and strokes her hair, cradling her against his side to keep the chill of the night at bay. Jack can't hear what he's telling her, but he can see the connection between them. So it doesn't surprise him when they get her settled into her room that Bethan runs up to Ianto and hugs him, whispering something in his ear. The fact that she says something at all is victory enough for Jack.
Besides he knows better than to ask. Ianto won't ever share her confidence. He's always been like that, an even better keeper of secrets than Jack. And again, maybe the whole deception with Lisa should have been clearer. Anyone who's willing to guard someone else's secrets probably has a few of his own.
He watches as Helen kisses Ianto's cheeks, telling him his Mum raised a good boy, thanking him for the coffee and making him promise to visit, and not just because he always brings coffee.
They are quiet until they board the boat back to Cardiff. "So I was thinking."
Ianto turns around to face Jack, leaning back against the rail on the side of the boat. "Always a dangerous prospect, Sir."
Jack can't help but smile at Ianto's sarcasm. He's missed it over the last few weeks. And he's more than willing to take it as a sign that things between them have begun to recover. Of course what he was thinking might just throw a spanner into that. "As I was saying, I was thinking about how insistent you were to have me hire you. I mean not that I didn’t enjoy our tag team weevil hunting or the pterodactyl catching. Not to mention your coffee."
The playfulness is gone from Ianto's voice. "Is there a point to that thought?"
Jack takes a deep breath, exhales and twists the knife. Sometimes opening old wounds is the only way to truly heal. “Yes, there is. Was Lisa the only reason?"
“Yes." Ianto takes a shuddering breath. "At least at first maybe. I couldn’t care for her anywhere else. But I meant what I said. I saw what they did at Canary Wharf and I wanted... want to make a difference.”
Jack knew the answer before he asked the question, so he's a bit surprised by his own bitterness. "So you settled for being our butler. Way to make a difference.”
It seems Ianto's surprised as well. "And I thought you were over being angry?"
Jack shrugs. "I’m contrary like that. I know you can fight. I know you know how to handle a gun. You’re probably a better shot than me and that’s saying a lot, so why settle for being our housekeeper?"
Ianto paces the deck and then turns back to Jack, his voice controlled but angry. “You didn’t have any openings, remember. I had to jump through hoops and catch a bloody dinosaur before you’d even let me do that."
Jack snorts. "I don’t remember any hoops. Maybe we’ll try that when you get back. After Suzie, you could have petitioned for a promotion."
Ianto doesn't take the bait. "Just because I can shoot a gun or take down a weevil doesn’t mean I want to be a field agent, Sir."
Jack walks over to Ianto. This time he allows himself to reach out and place a hand on Ianto's shoulder. "What aren’t you telling me Ianto? I thought we agreed no more secrets."
Jack can tell that Ianto wants to contradict that point. No promises were made, at least not in words. But Jack knows that Ianto agreed to those terms without question. Ianto bows his head down, not meeting Jack's eyes. "I pushed for more responsibility in London. I was a good researcher, great even, but I wanted more. I wanted to be on the front line. I was relentless. I wore them down until they agreed to let me go out on missions. I was in the field when the Cybermen attacked. It was why I survived. I got to headquarters only after it had started burning.”
So that's it. The last secret Ianto was too embarrassed to share. “So you think, if you’d been there, you’d been able to stop it. And people call me egotistical.”
This time Ianto looks directly into Jack's eyes. "No, I couldn’t have stopped it. And you are egotistical. But I could have helped. I could have...”
Jack gets it. He knows a thing or two about survival guilt. “Saved Lisa? Or died trying.”
Ianto exhales. “Yes.”
“So you think by staying behind you can prevent the next attack?”
"I learned to stick with what I do best."
Jack's quite sure that Ianto has no idea how much he actually means to the team. They did take him for granted and Jack will make damn sure that doesn't happen again. "And what about protecting your teammates in the field? There are only five of us Ianto. We could use more than just your intimate knowledge of the Dewey Decimal System."
“Are you saying you want me to become part of the team?
Never again. “You are part of the team Ianto. You're more than just the hired help. You keep us going when the rest of us are ready to give up."
Ianto laughs with no humor. "I'm not sure the others would agree."
Jack reaches out again and cuffs Ianto's shoulder. "Maybe not today, but they'll come to understand. None of us are perfect, Ianto. We need you just as much as I think you need us. And not just to pick up our shit, but to hold us all together."
"And if I refuse?"
Jack shakes his head and smiles. “You won’t. Just like you won’t ever refuse to help me with this little side project.”
Ianto doesn't give an answer on the first part, but Jack hears it loud and clear. "It’s not their fault what happened to them. They deserve whatever comfort we can provide them."
He hates to bind Ianto to such misery, but he really is the only person Jack trusts with the knowledge. "That’s why you’re the man for the job."
"The job?"
And maybe it's just what Ianto needs, a purpose. A way to redeem himself for what he did to Lisa and for Lisa. "I need you to make me a promise, Ianto."
Ianto shakes his head and smiles wryly at Jack. "You are aware that I haven’t exactly moved along from anger to admiration yet."
Jack smiles back. "I’m not worried. It’s only a matter of time."
“Egotistical.”
Jack can't argue with that. "Yep. But more importantly, I know you won’t abandon those tossed back by the rift."
“What’s the promise?”
Jack motions for Ianto to join him at the railing to watch the island fade into the darkness of the sea. “Well you know that the funds to keep the island afloat will last at least the next 50 years, but if something happens to me, I need you to promise that you’ll help rescue any other survivors who come through and take them there.”
Ianto scrubs the back of his neck with his hand. “Why not let the rest of the team in on it. It’s not like it’s a dirty little secret.” The 'not like mine,' remains unsaid.
Jack grips the railing before turning to look at Ianto once more. “Because you and I both know that they all would become obsessed with it. Tosh would try to predict when it would happen next and we both know that’s impossible. Owen would do his damnedest to cure them when we both know there’s no cure. And Gwen....Gwen would want to reunite them with their families and try for a happy ending when we both know there will never be one. We make them comfortable. We provide them with as much care and caring as we can until they finally find their peace. There are things we can’t fix and I don’t think anyone else is ready to face that."
Ianto meets Jack's eyes. "And who’s fault is that?"
Jack sighs. "Mine. I know it. And I want it that way. I want them to think anything is possible. I want that hope to carry them through."
Ianto's looks down and he gets quiet, ghostlike. "But not for me."
Fuck. That's not what he meant at all. Jack reaches out and puts his hand under Ianto's chin making the other man meet his eyes. "You learned a hard lesson these last few weeks Ianto, but I’m pretty sure you already knew it after Canary Wharf even if you couldn’t face it then. And the thing is you know it, you accept it but you haven’t lost that hope. Even after everything, you haven’t lost that hope. That's why you could comfort Bethan, even make her smile, and that’s why I need you to promise."
Ianto takes a moment to search Jack's face and he must find what he's looking for. “You have my word, Sir.”
Jack let's go of the breath he was holding. "Thank you."
Ianto just nods. "Can I ask you a question now?"
Jack smiles. "Only fair."
"Is this why you didn’t Retcon me?"
That's not the question he was expecting. He'll have to keep reminding himself that Ianto Jones has hidden depths. He can't tell Ianto the truth, not yet, but he can't bare to lie to him either, so he compromises. "No. That was for your coffee. I couldn’t face the world without your coffee."
Ianto snorts. “I haven’t been there to make the coffee for the last two weeks.”
“Believe me I know. The team is about ready to kill each other because of it.”
"Only fair."
Jack laughs. "Things are going to be all right Ianto."
"Maybe they will be." And from the look on his face, Jack can tell that for the first time since Lisa, Ianto might really believe that.
~*~*~*~
Epilogue
Jack yanks on Ianto's tie and pulls him flush against him as he enters Jack's office. "You sent Gwen out to the island." He tries for a scolding tone, but Ianto always seems immune. Of course, the fact that he's massaging Ianto's shoulders probably doesn't help get that point across.
Ianto smiles and kisses Jack's jaw. "I may have laid down the crumbs. She followed them. I told you long ago, it wasn't a dirty little secret."
Sighing, Jack knows it's a lost cause. He lets go of Ianto and walks over to his desk to sit down. "And she reacted exactly as I said she would."
"So you were right about that, but you weren't right about not telling her the truth."
Jack looks up at Ianto. "It wasn't your decision to make."
"Jack, you made me make a promise, to look after those thrown back by the rift. I did that. Even after you left, I did that."
"I know. Helen told me. She said you visited every week."
"Do you have any idea how hard it was to find and take care of the victims, to get them out to the island by myself without telling the rest of the team? But I did it. I made you a promise and I kept it and I'll continue to keep it, but my loyalty to you isn't blind Jack. I'm going to pick you up on things when I think you're wrong."
Jack knows he's pouting. "But I wasn't wrong."
Ianto puts his hand on his hips and sighs. He moves over to sit on the edge of Jack's desk. "About her reaction, no. But you were wrong to shut her down without so much as an explanation. You've surrounded yourself with people who figure out impossible equations, who fight to save humanity. We are not the type of people who will ever take no for an answer without a reason behind it. You know that Jack. You picked us for that very purpose, so you don't really have the right to get angry because we live up to the expectations you want us to."
Jack likes that Ianto now included himself in that 'us', but he still wasn't keen on such mutiny, no matter if Ianto was right about it or not. "It still wasn't your decision to make."
"No, it wasn't. But you wouldn't listen to reason. And you're the one who decided that it's my duty to look out for and watch over the team."
Jack leans back in his chair and smiles wryly. "You know, I hate it when you use my words against me."
Leaning down, Ianto strokes the back of Jack's neck and kisses his forehead. "You'll get over it. And before you get angry at me for making another executive decision without your permission, I'm planning on Retconing Nicki back to before she visited Jonah. I've found a suitable body in the vaults. Dental records will confirm that it's Jonah. She'll have her closure and while it's not the answer she's looking for, it's still better than the one she got."
Jack nods. Sometimes he forgets just how very efficient Ianto can be. "I was planning something similar myself."
"I thought so." Ianto puts his hand on the back of his own neck like he does when he is trying to figure something out. "What I don't know what do is how to help Jonah. To give him his Mum, only to take her away again. Helen says Retcon won't work."
There's only one answer left for Jonah. It is always the hardest decision to make. "I'll take care of Jonah."
"Jack."
Ianto's voice is soft, full of comfort and Jack lets it wash over him. "His organs are shutting down, he's in constant pain. It's time to end it."
Nodding, Ianto places his hand on Jack's shoulder and squeezes. "I'll go with you."
"You don't have to. I don't want..."
Ianto gives Jack a knowing smile that Jack's pretty sure he's stolen from him. "His death on my hands as well. Who do you think made these decisions when you were gone Jack?"
Christ. He never thought. "I never meant."
Ianto pulls him into a hug. "It's fine. I knew what I was getting into when I made the promise. Call it penance. I'll call it mercy, but I'm not letting you do this alone."
Jack knew he should insist on going alone. He never meant for Ianto to take on so much responsibility. It was his burden to bear. But then again he was just selfish enough to want Ianto there after it was over. Cupping Ianto's face, Jack kisses him. "I'll let Helen know we're coming."
With a final squeeze to Jack's shoulder, Ianto steps away. "I'll go start making the coffee."
Jack takes a deep breath and smiles. He can't believe how far they've come. "Do I get a cup of it this time?"
Ianto smiles back and it's all the forgiveness that Jack will ever need. "Yep. I say this time you've earned it."
—FIN—
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